May 4, 2010

Holding Back

I've always wanted to do a creative marathon. Staying up to create for 24 straight hours sounds exhilarating to me. There's a lot of that going on. You can sign up for a 3-day novel writing contest and sit in a designated book store typing frantically to finish a book. You can join a group and participate in a 24-hour comic-making challenge, or a painting challenge, or a design challenge.

I'm a fan of National Novel Writing Month where participants are challenged to write 50,000 words in 30 days. But to go somewhere and be a part of a group for the entirety of a challenge sounds dirty, gritty and fun.

I'm under no illusions of how difficult it actually is to stay up for 24 straight hours. I pulled so many all-nighters in college and I remember how awful I felt the next day, standing shakily through the evaluation, stomach in a tight knot, head pounding. But the recollection of how wonderful it felt to create something, solve a problem out of thin air, and finish is much more vivid. To be able to say, "Here, I made this, and it was worth sacrificing sleep and sanity for," outshone the trembling and indigestion.

But I'm sure you can figure out why I've never done a creative marathon outside my own house. Could you imagine taking a break to try to shave in a bookstore bathroom? Ick.

Just one of the many things I feel I can't do comfortably because of who I am.

I type that with smiling resignation. I know what I'm doing. I could participate and damn all the curious looks. But I won't. Yet. Maybe Future Allerleirah will be confident enough.

Also, the results of the poll have been tallied and it looks like everyone thinks All Kinds of Fur should get into social networking. Stay tuned for links to profiles!

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